The Night the Whiskey Froze 2004

This CD package doubles as a greeting card, there is space for a personal greeting and a fold-back flap for mailing.

My heartfelt thanks to the Chowderhead singers. I wanted the chorus to sound enthuiastic, not refined, so invited a group of friends over, fed them chowder and beer (not the best preparation for singers!) and we recorded all the chorus songs. So when the reviewer said, "It sounds like he dragged a bunch of people in off the street" it's not far off the mark.

Thank you Tim Badgely, Fred Bowers, Cathy Cartwright, Steve Cartwright, Doreen Conboy, Claire Curtis, Alan Davis, Heather Elowe, Phine Ewing, Tad Lyford, Doug Portsik, Sharon Pyne.

The Night Before Christmas - Downeast 7:28
© 1990 Julia Lane (who wishes to remain anonamous)

Fred Gosbee - Storyteller, piano, sound effects

The Christmas Hornpipe 2:26
Traditional

Fred Gosbee - tinwhistle
Julia Lane - harp

Shopping Shanty 3:14
© 1989 Brian Chadbourne BMI

Fred Gosbee - lead vocal
Chowderhead Singers - chorus

'Twas a cold and windy morning in December
And all of me money it was spent
Where it went to I really can't remember
So down to the credit union I went

  Santa, come back! Take up the slack!
  My Christmas list gets longer every year
  Oh, why does it have to start before Thanksgiving?
  It's enough to make me lose my Christmas cheer.

This year there was a great demand for presents
For friends and relations one and all
So I jumped into my car feeling quite pleasant
And soon was looking for parking at the mall.

I was in the toy department when I saw 'em
Such an ug-a-ly bunch I never see before
There was G.I. Joe and Spiderman and Barbie
And game boys piled up on the floor

So I soon made my mind up that I'd leave there
Jump in my car and homeward I would go
The weather bureau said that it would be fair
But soon the road was covered with ice and snow

For old Jack Frost he knew a thing or two, sir.
Soon I found me off the road again
I spent all of me money buying presents
And forgot to put the snow tires on again

So there I was once more again at Sears, boys
The same old ruddy business over again
So reach into your pocket and get your plastic
And listen to the registers refrain

The Frozen Logger 3:06
© James Stevens

Fred Gosbee - vocal, 12-string guitar

As I sat down one evening, twas in a small café
A six foot seven waitress to me these words did say
I see that you are a logger and not just a common bum
For no one but a logger stirs his coffee with his thumb

I once had a logger lover. There's none like him today.
If you poured whiskey on it he would eat a bale of hay.
And he never shaved a whisker from off his horny hide.
He just hammered in the bristles and chewed them off inside.

My logger came to see me on a cold december day
He held me in a fond embrace that broke three vertabrae
He kissed me when we parted so hard it broke my jaw
So I couldn't speak to tell him he forgot his mackinaw

I watched my lover leaving though the frost and snow
Strolling gaily homeward at forty-six below.
The weather tried to freeze him. It tried its very best.
At a hundred degrees below zero he buttoned up his vest

It froze clear down to China. It froze the stars above.
At a thousand degrees below zero it froze my logger love.
And so I lost my lover and to this café I've come
Where I sit and wait for some one to stir coffee with his thumb.

The Rapogenus Christmas Ball 8:00
Holman Day

Fred Gosbee - reciter

The Night the Whiskey Froze 3:17
© Nikos Apollonio & Bob Stuart (verse 1 & 4) Fred Gosbee (verse 2 & 3)

Fred Gosbee - vocal, fiddle Julia Lane - harp

Oh, the stove was glowing a cherry red
That night we wore all of our clothed to be
And pulled the covers up over our heards
The night the whiskey froze

I've never known of a colder night
The wind was blowing with all it's might
And the mercury dropped out of sight
The night the whiskey froze

We wore our hats and mittens, too
To keep ourselves from turning blue
That's what we did and so would you
On a night that whiskey froze

But we were safe from the raging storm
We cuddled and snuggled all night to keep warm
But nine months later a child was born
From the night the whiskey froze.

Snowbound 4:55

Haul Away Snow 2:54
© Jim Stewart SOCAN

Fred Gosbee - lead vocal
Chowderhead Singers - chorus

When I was a little lad and so me mother told me
  Way haul away, we'll haul away snow
If you lick a frozen pipe your tongue is sure to hold thee
  Way haul away, we'll haul away snow

  Way haul away, we'll haul away together
  Way haul away, we'll haul away snow
  Way haul away We'll pray for better weather
  Way haul away, we'll haul away snow

I ain't got no four-wheel drive, I ain't got no snow blower.
So winter is a pain in the neck and sometimes even lower

Well I can't get to Florida, I'm financially unable
Besides I have a relationship with a set of booster cables

I once loved a New Brunswick gal but now we're seperated
For all I knew was Farenheight and she'd been metricated

Well I just cleared my driveway out; those snow drifts I was flinging
Then that bastard plow came 'round and filled the whole damn thing in

Gloomy Winter's No Awa' 4:16
© 2006 Fred Gosbee & Holly Morrison (with apologies to Robert Tannehill)

We returned from a week of presenting Robert Burns songs to an Elder Hostel (now known as Roads Scholars) to find the pipes to our upstairs bath frozen.

Fred Gosbee - vocal
Julia Lane - harp, voice

Gloomy winter's no awa'
Snell the norland winds dae blow
Sae noo ance mair me pipes tae thaw
I light my propane torch-i-o

Though we pit them in wi' care
There's a place that maun bide bare
Sae noo, wi' mony a wince an' swear
I squattle neath my porch-i-o

I must gang oot, though weel I ken
Ootside it's minus twenty-yin
Wi' snaw and gowsty, wapplin' wind
It disnae please me well-i-o

This comes o' me ilka year
But one fond wish I cul ye dear
When I quit this mortal sphere
There's nae gelt pipes in hell-i-o

Glossary
Actually there is a translation on the audio track.

Tae a Moose 2:37
© 2000 Fred Gosbee

Another song where familiarity with the Scots tongue is helpful. A moose in Scotland would be a mouse in America. A moose in America is, in Scotland, ???

Fred Gosbee - lead vocal
Julia Lane - chorul vocal

Powder! 5:55

Fred Gosbee- storyteller

Frost & Snow 2:37
Traditional

Fred Gosbee - Irish Flute
Julia Lane - harp

The Seasons 0:36

Fred Gosbee - storyteller

Yard Sale 4:24
words © 2000 Fred Gosbee

Fred Gosbee - lead vocal
Chowderhead Singers - chorus

  Yard sale! Yard sale all over the town
  Go up in the attic and bring it all down
  Put it out on your lawn for people to buy
  You can dicker if they say the price is too high

Now here's to the people from near and from far
Who pull off the road and stop in our yard
Who stop in our yard for an hour or so
And then leave us holding a bunch of their dough

There's a plate in that box that you really should get.
It might be the one to complete your good set.
You never know where you might find what you seek
When they're selling junk but you're buying antiques.

Now what it that thing that they've got over there?
I think that I've seen one just like it somewhere
Back in the old days when I was a kid.
I never could figure out just what it did.

I found a guitar with only three strings,
A fife and a drum and some other great things
A french horn, a fiddle without any bow
But they just sold the bagpipes an hour ago.

Here is a key without any lock,
Might go to that train, might go to that clock
The train's go no track, the clock's got no chime.
I bet I can get either one for a dime

Look at these dresses. They're all really nice
And you never will find them again at this price.
The only thing wrong with them I can see
Is they're to small for you and they're too big for me

Now where is the girl with that little cash box
Who'll give us our change for the stuff that we got
The stuff that we got but know we won't keep
'Cause we're having a sale of our own just next week!